a Living Well practice
There is so much in the world right now that feels heavy, frightening, and out of our hands. When the world gets wild, my mind starts to spin. That spinning affects my mood and feelings in an unnecessarily negative way.
All of this lives in my inner space, and when left unattended, it loops. I ruminate, and I can build stories to soothe myself that are usually far harsher than the truth.
The good news is, I found a way through. It is called gratitude journaling, and it has two steps.
This essay is one of four practices in the Living Well pillar at The Gracewell Studio. If you want the full guide to healthspan over lifespan, mind, body, and spirit held as one whole, start at the pillar here.
Thoughts are seeds
Here is how I see it. Thoughts are seeds. When a seed shows up, I pause and notice it. Then I choose which seed I water and let grow. The choosing happens through writing, and the writing has two parts.
Step one: empty it out
First, I dump everything. Stream of consciousness, no structure, no plan. I let every tangled thought spill onto the page until there is nothing left. Then I sit with the moment, feel it, and I notice relief.
This part is more than venting. Putting hard feelings into words is its own medicine. A 2023 review of randomized trials found that expressive writing, the simple act of getting difficult thoughts onto paper, eased distress even for people moving through cancer treatment (Zhang et al., 2023). If it can steady someone in that storm, it can steady us in ours.
Step two: plant something good
Then comes the pivot. I start listing what I am grateful for, beginning right where I sit. I look around. I have Boo, my Boston Bestie. Take a look around the site and you will find her presence throughout. I have a bed. A safe room that I love. My children. My home. Food in the pantry. Work to show up for. Friends who hold me. Family who love me. A planet that sustains me. A spirit that moves through me. A connection to something far bigger than my worry. And gratitude for the woman I am, and the one I am becoming.
This is not wishful thinking. Across 25 randomized trials with thousands of people, expressing gratitude reliably lifted wellbeing (Kirca et al., 2023).
Two studies that were never meant to meet
Here is what moves me. One of those studies sits in clinical psychology, in the hardest rooms of human life. The other sits in positive psychology, in the science of happiness. They were not written to be read side by side.
But my practice needs both. Step one, the dump, is the release. Step two, the gratitude, is the redirect. Empty out the heavy. Then plant the grateful. The relief comes from the writing. The rewiring comes from the thanks. The order is the medicine.
And every time, this practice does the same powerful thing. It releases me from the chaos of the spiral into the gentle, loving embrace of the larger us.
Keep going
If you want to sit longer with the inner work, the perspective and the sacred underneath all of this, wander into the Believe Path. It is where this practice opens into something wider.
And give your words a home worth keeping. A Gracewell notebook cover turns a plain journal into something handmade and yours, the kind of object you reach for first on the heavy days.
a blessing before you go
May you notice the seed before you water it.
May you find the courage to empty what feels heavy.
May you land on one true thing to be grateful for, even today.
And may your gratitude carry you home to yourself, and out into the great wide us.
Go gracefully. 🤍
Rev. Kristina Soto, RN, BSN
References
Kirca, A. M., Malouff, J. M., & Meynadier, J. (2023). The effect of expressed gratitude interventions on psychological wellbeing: A meta-analysis of randomised controlled studies. International Journal of Applied Positive Psychology, 8, 63-86. https://doi.org/10.1007/s41042-023-00086-6
Zhang, C., Xu, S., Wen, X., & Liu, M. (2023). The effect of expressive writing on Chinese cancer patients: A systematic review and meta-analysis of randomized control trials. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy, 30(6), 1357-1368. https://doi.org/10.1002/cpp.2878
